Obama Weighs in On Dog Pants Debate

Remember the passionate debate surrounding that picture that asked how a dog would wear pants if it could? Here, let me refresh your memory:

Above: the question that took the world by storm. Would a dog wear its pants on all four legs, or just its hind ones? How do shirts factor into all of this? It’s one of those open-ended questions that will baffle philosophers for years to come.

Ah, you remember know, don’t you? Well, those of us on the “hind legs only” side just received a prominent endorsement from America’s Commander in Chief. In a recent interview with Adande Thorne (aka Swoozie), the president called the “all four” pants style “too conservative.”

This will surely provoke a rebuttal from Speaker of the House Paul Ryan.

“The American people really want to know this one. I lied. This is actually a serious one,” Thorne told Obama, during a “lightning round” of pop culture-related questions. “If you had to pick a pair of pants for your dog, A or B?”

“No, you gotta go with this,” Obama said, while pointing to the “hind legs” pants style in the infamous dog diagram.

“This one? This is your final answer? You don’t want to phone a friend?” Thorne pushed him.

“This one is a little too conservative,” Obama said, pointing to the “all four” pants style. “Too much. Too much fabric,” Obama said.

So there you have it. Obama has officially weighed in on the most pressing question of our generation. This moment will no doubt go down in history as a definitive victory for the “hind legs” camp.

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