When you own a cat, you get used to seeing its anus. It’s just part of being a cat owner: working at your desk? How about a cat anus in your face? Relaxing on the sofa? Nope, cat anus. Eating a bowl of cereal for breakfast? Look over there, it’s a cat anus. Eventually, that butt hole staring at you from across the room just becomes a part of everyday life.
But now, cat owners can finally get a break. Twinkle Tush, a necklace-like accessory that hides your cat’s exposed butt with a jewel, costs just six dollars, and gives kittehs everywhere the chance to regain some dignity.
Okay, let’s be clear: Twinkle Tush is a gag gift. It’s doubtful the finicky, fidgety, scratch-your-eyeballs-out-with-their-claws demon of the domestic pet world would be very happy with a sparkly jewel rubbing against their butt hole all the time. But hey, not all cats mind the occasional accessory, so if you’re really that concerned — the Twinkle Tush might be for you.
On their official website, Twinkle Tush introduces their product with this video:
If you still aren’t convinced, the company offers a few reasons Twinkle Tush is right for you and your cat.
“Have you ever thrown a respectable cocktail party at your home only to have your feline family member come out and proudly display their uncovered rear? While kitty might enjoy showing off their brown eye, we’re sure your guests don’t like to see that one eyed monster while munching on their caviar. Give your cat some class. Hang a Twinkle Tush from their tail and cover that butt in bling.”
Sure, cat anuses aren’t exactly beautiful works of art, but at least they’re expected. You see a cat, you know you’ll be seeing its butt hole in short order. Fine. But anus-jewelry? Now THAT will lead to some awkward party conversation.
“Does your cat have ongoing battles with paparazzi? Those vultures are just waiting to take a photo of your kitty’s bare behind. Are you going to let your Mr. Whisker’s uncovered butt show up in tomorrow’s paper? Spare Mr. Whiskers the embarrassment. Give him a Twinkle Tush.”
It’s a little ridiculous to apply this reasoning to cats, but maybe some celebrities could heed this advice. Do they make these things for human anuses?
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