You might have noticed that Taylor Swift is something of a celebrity enigma. She’s not what you call a recluse, but a lot of things we know about Taylor’s life and opinion come from inference and assumption. Take how, in 2016, people claimed she was voting for Hillary Clinton based on Taylor’s sweater, which sort of resembled a dress Hillary once wore but was also like the fashion choice of the season for waif-like blonde girls. We’re imparting upon Ms. Swift some Queen’s-broaches level of cloak-and-dagger sartorial commentary.
But Swift is silent no longer! Yes, like nearly every other entertainer and celebrity, it turns out she’s got a Democratic bent. What a jaw-dropping shock. Here, just for fun: try naming five current-generation famous people, off the top of your head only, that support Republicans but are not famous solely for their support of Republicans. Clint Eastwood, Charleston Heston, and the other members of the Desiccated Grandpa Guild don’t count.
Taylor Swift, Accidental Alt-Right Cause Célèbre
The funny story is that Taylor Swift’s silence has been sort of taken as tacit support for Trump. She’s actually been called an “Aryan goddess” by more than one person. You know, because she’s blond, white, and wasn’t obviously a Democrat. That’s all it takes to be an Aryan goddess these days, apparently: inflation has really done a number on the quality of Aryan goddesses in today’s world, apparently.
Swift has been supported by everyone in the alt-right from literal Nazis to reactionaries of all stripes. It’s probably done wonders for recruitment numbers among the sweaty white male demographic. After all, they’ve long proven they will continue to assume girls are into them despite literally no interaction between the two of them. It would hardly be the first “misunderstand” members of 4chan had about how women work.
Predictably, the far right has been riven with the betrayal. How could this star, the one they called “our girl,” sell out to the left like that? All the not-talking about politics meant she was obviously agreeing with our politics! That’s how silence works, dummy!
This is the Story of a Cat
But how did it come to be that Taylor Swift is embraced by the alt-right, despite zero public or private interest? Surely it will not surprise you to discover that it’s kind of a funny story.
4chan seems to think that they named Taylor’s cat.
Of the many thousands of posts on 4chan one day, one post was soliciting cat names. In defiance of the board’s near-universal disdain of everything, it seems posters took it seriously and offered real names instead of Sir Cock’n’Balls or Lord Fortnite. Weirdly, Meredith made it pretty far in the running. AND GUESS WHO NAMED HER CAT MEREDITH MY DUDE.
Why, Ms. Swift, of course.
Be not dismayed that Taylor apparently named her cat several days before this alleged poll. And be not dismayed that, for this story to be true, it would require Taylor to actually use 4chan. And be not dismayed that she hardly gives off the appearance of your standard 4chan user: a bad-tempered B student with a victim complex.
In her becoming-a-real-adult moment, Swift has decided to publicly throw her support behind a Democrat in a close race. And we certainly appreciate the thought, but is it sad that her opinion on politics will cause more folks to vote than all the good arguments for voting in the world? Surely it says something that voter registration numbers ballooned in the wake of this reveal. But it doesn’t seem to say much good.
You might also be interested in the following posts:
Fact Checkers Dying From Overwork As Trump Just Won’t Shut Up
Taylor Swift Buys Adult Domains For Reasons
9 Tweets About The Kavanaugh FBI Investigation That Will Blow Your Mind
Image by Jana Beamer
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