Martha Stewart's Reddit AMA As Perfect As Her Souffles

Oh, my God, you guys — Martha Stewart did a Reddit AMA, and it’s everything we ever could have hoped it would be … and more.

Martha Stewart has been a personal hero for me for most of my life, beginning when she really started to crossover in fame during my teen years. Her apology-free style of doing her thing has always been entirely inspirational, and when she handled going to jail like a boss, she became a billion times cooler.

Just saw @joliekerr‘s book: https://t.co/6UujfFm0KI You can ask me anything! Please do so Thurs. 3/6 @ 2pm EST during my @reddit_AMA chat

— Martha Stewart (@MarthaStewart) February 26, 2014

Martha Stewart, man. If anyone is a living example of giving absolutely no fucks and being happy, it’s her. So over on Reddit, Martha gave her often unvarnished yet still mostly polite opinions on a number of things, starting with truffle oil. Which, by the way, Stewart finds an abomination and insult to nearly every dish — she sniffs:

“I think truffle oil is one of the few ingredients that doesn’t belong in anyone’s kitchen. It is ruinous of most recipes.”

Clear, concise, and to the motherfucking truffle oil point.

She also explains how she can manage her Marthaness and still have friends — when asked if she “corrects” people on domestic matters, Stewart sagely says:

“I learned many years ago never to criticize, only compliment. Even if their home is horrifyingly awful.”

No question was balk-worthy for Martha, who even opined on impersonations — she admitted:

“There have been many. None of which are very accurate or flattering. But Ana Gasteyer on SNL did a good job.”

While Martha undoubtedly owned the thread, u/thatblacksamurai managed to briefly wrest the mic away to laud Stewart heavily, beginning:

“ALLOW ME TO EXPAND MY LOGIC … martha stewart is prime wifey material … for starters, she’s probably done more time than your favourite rapper, so you KNOW that basic bitches ain’t tryna fuck with you for fear of M-Steez going orange is the new black on their bitchasses; she’ll shank a bitch with a knitting needle and make you a bloodstained durag or scarf or whatever.”

He continues:

“then, she’ll cook you food you can’t pronounce just for the hell of it, you can ask your girl to make you a struggle sandwich all you want, but i’m out here munching on azerbaijani-influnced hors d’oeuvres and diamond studded cookies … this all goes without mentioning that she can tap into that older woman bedroom energy; it’s like a spirit bomb for post menopausal women, which means that you’re gonna be taken care of every night— shit, it’s so good you’ll need approximately 6 business days to recover so maybe not … if you disagree go argue with someone else, #teammarthaforlife #thankyoubasedgod.”