Don’t Suck At Facebook #383: Don’t Gaslight Your Facebook Friends

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Usually, Social News Daily‘s “Don’t Suck At Facebook” series addresses Facebook behaviors that suck, like tagging people in random pictures or using Facebook to passive-aggressively call out your significant other for forgetting to call you.

Today, we’re going to go slightly offline to address a Facebook habit that well and truly sucks, and you’re being an ass if you do it.

Monday’s advice to not suck at Facebook involves the times in life when you do something really shitty to someone, and Facebook exposes your duplicity.

Maybe you told a friend that you were going to your grandma’s house and got tagged at a party to which he wasn’t invited, making him feel both left out and tricked by his buddy. (Nice one, dude.) Maybe you lied to your boyfriend or girlfriend about the extent of a relationship, and they feel like you’re hiding stuff from them. (Which you totally are.)

Maybe you exposed your sister’s personal business under the auspices of just speaking generally, when anyone who knows your sister knows you’re specifically criticizing her. Maybe your mom had to find out through Facebook that you’re once again seeing that guy that crashed her Honda.

Whatever it is, we’ve noticed an irritating trend of people diverting responsibility for hurting others and blaming Facebook. This shitty move serves two purposes. One, it unfairly dismisses the other party’s legit complaint about something terrible you did. And two, it goes further in adding insult to injury by insinuating the wronged person is being dramatic … because they’re getting mad over Facebook, and not being misled or otherwise done wrong by you.

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Nowadays, you can take the word “Facebook” and replace it with “a bar” or “my mom’s house” or “the front yard,” because Facebook is just another place in which we have interactions with each other. The mere circumstance of a dispute being communicated through Facebook does not automagically convert the situation into online drama, and make it less important.

So don’t suck at Facebook, and if you’re a dick to someone you care about, don’t pretend the bad stuff you did is unreasonable as a complaint merely because you got found out on Facebook.



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