It’s easy to get carried away at the beginning of a new relationship. You’ll feel excited, and your hormones will make you feel on top of the world. You might even start making future plans, and at the very least, your mood will be boosted. However, it’s a good idea not to move too fast too soon if you want to see the relationship last for the long term. With that in mind, here are some things you should do at the start of a relationship to ensure it moves in the right direction at the right speed.
Look at the Positive
If you’re honest with yourself, you have flaws. These faults can be all kinds of things, and often they are nothing to worry about – they’re just facets of your personality. What you need to remember is that everyone else also has flaws, and no one is perfect. If you want to spend a lot of time searching for the perfect partner, the truth is you’ll never find them, and in the meantime, you’ll miss out on some amazing relationships with people who are great but not perfect.
If you try to make someone into a perfect person, this will just cause problems in your relationship too. So just as searching for Mr or Ms. Right will usually mean you stay single, thinking you can change someone (especially someone who doesn’t want to be changed) will have the same effect.
The best thing you can do is to focus on the positive aspects of a potential partner. Although you shouldn’t overlook big flaws that mean you’re not compatible, smaller ones won’t make a lot of difference.
Don’t Have Sex
When you meet someone new and you’re attracted to them, it makes sense that you would want to have sex with them. However, if you want the relationship to last for a long time, studies have shown that it’s better to wait until you get intimate. Ideally, you should spend time getting to know the person before you go to bed with them. When you know you are good friends with that person, and your personalities are compatible, you can move to the next stage.
In the meantime, you can ensure you are ready for this step. You can think about birth control and even get std testing to make sure you can move forward without any problems when the time is right.
Be Yourself
Again, this is probably advice you have heard time and time before, but if that’s the case, then it’s only because it’s good advice. Think about how tiring it would be if you had to keep up a front all the time you were with a new partner because you started the relationship pretending to be something or someone you’re not. What if the relationship gets deeper? Will you have to put on an act for the rest of your life? As you can see, this would not be a good idea.
The best thing to do is to be yourself from the start. Not only is this easier for you, allowing you to focus on the relationship rather than trying to be someone else, but it also means that the person you’re with understands who you actually are. If the relationship progresses, it’s because they like you, not someone else.
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