Naming a new baby is hard. That’s just a fact.
Think about it. Most parents want a name that is meaningful, somewhat-original, and doesn’t spell out anything dirty when initialised. After all, your kid is going to be stuck with it for the rest of their lives.
Not only that, but both parents have to like it, or at the very least, be comfortable with the choice of moniker, which seems to be easier said than done.
Reddit user u/grambo is having this exact problem. In a post to r/AmITheAsshole?, the dad-to-be detailed his struggle with his girlfriend’s choice of baby name.
He wrote: “My girlfriend and I are expecting our first born son.
“The other night when discussing names, she said she would like his middle name to be that of her ex, who died. Saying further that it would mean a lot to his family who she is still close with.”
However, u/grambo says the suggestion makes him “really uncomfortable,” but his partner doesn’t understand the issue.
He elaborated: “I don’t want to tell people, especially my son, that he is partly named after another man who his mum loved before me.
“She said, ‘Why can’t you say he is named after my friend who died? We weren’t even together when he died’.”
To complicate things further, the ex in question died of a drug overdose – something else u/grambo doesn’t want to have to explain to his child in the future.
He concluded his post with: “It feels pretty shitty to even be asked to name him that. Am I the asshole? “
Reddit seems to think no, he’s not the asshole in this situation.
One person commented: “That’s weird. You don’t like the name for obvious reasons, and your girlfriend should respect that.”
While another user said: “It’s a useless gesture anyway. It’ll make her feel better for five minutes and then it will fade. Seems like a super immature request.”
“Anytime someone asks about the middle name it’s going to make you feel terrible,” warned a third.
Well, at least the parents aren’t planning on naming the kid Assman.