America Gets More Brown; White Racists Spasm Uncontrollably

It’s an undeniable fact that American is trending towards brownness. Once presumed to be a permanently light-skinned nation, demographic data has long shown that white folks will soon lose their nationwide majority. They’ll still hold a plurality, of course, making them the largest slice of the demographic pie. But they’ll no longer make up more fifty percent of the nation’s citizens. And in the face of this government-collected demographic data, white racists have been losing. their. shit.

With this fact in view, the recent rise of white supremacy movements is less surprising. It contextualizes the rise of race-fueled hatred, offering an explanation for what might otherwise seem like a sudden and strange event. White racists feel that they’re losing their position of privilege in society. And it’s true: they are. Society is, by and large, becoming more tolerant and diverse. But just like a Dad insisting he has control over the remote because he owns the television, white racists have been insisting that they own the country and you dirty brown people can’t take it, no way no how.

Because their title to the country is so obviously just and inalienable, right? I mean, their grandpas came over here and killed all the brown people really dead: are you saying they’re going to have to kill brown people all over again? Can’t these folks just learn their places? Can’t they just bow and scrape for all time thanks to a random and cosmically unjust roll of the resource dice at the start of the world’s creation? Surely that is how the world should be: it’s been that way for like five percent of the time it’s existed.

White racists would love to continue to be the kids in with all the best toys, jealously insisting that they deserve their largess because their parents are rich. But just as two cultures tend to merge together over time with sufficient exposure, skin color has been doing the same since the beginning of time. While the white racists of the world would love for white people to only marry white people, they won’t have their gift of racial purity any time soon. As much as these white racists would love to flash back to the world of “Leave It To Beaver,” demographic shifts like that simply don’t happen overnight. This minority of angry men might see those in interracial marriages as race traitors, it’s clearly the wave of the future.

One day, not far from now, the face of American will no longer be a white man. Instead, it will be a light brown complexion. Will this annihilate racial tension? You wish! Even in this monochrome future world, we’ll still see hierarchies of skin color. If the past is any evidence, such ranking will exist for all time. Even perfectly identical skin tones wouldn’t help: white people once excluded folks like Irish and Italians from their ranks based on country of origin, facial features, and cultural background. Racism is, unfortunately, here to stay forever. White people, however, are not so permanent.

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Alex Fox


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