‘Dilbert’ Creator Scott Adams: I’m Endorsing Hillary So Her Supporters Don’t Murder Me

His cartoons may be a brilliant satire of ’90s corporate culture, but Dilbert creator Scott Adams is actually completely f*cking insane. From his insistence that “fossils are bullshit” to his astronomically high ego and self-adulation on display in his internet comments, Dilbert creator Scott Adams is walking, excessively talking proof that great art doesn’t have to come from great men—or sane ones, for that matter.

Dilbert creator Scott Adams, whom I will only refer to as Dilbert creator Scott Adams (he certainly isn’t much else), isn’t exactly politically savvy. Though he’s flirted with supporting Donald Trump, Dilbert creator Scott Adams ultimately endorsed Democratic candidate Hillary Clinton—out of apparent fear that her supporters would assassinate him if he did otherwise.

“I’ve decided to come off the sidelines and endorse a candidate for President of the United States,” Dilbert creator Scott Adams wrote in a blog post.

“This past week,” he added, “we saw Clinton pair the idea of President Trump with nuclear disaster, racism, Hitler, the Holocaust, and whatever else makes you tremble in fear.”

Dilbert creator Scott Adams went on to say Clinton’s newfound “persuasion” skills are “likely to trigger a race war in the United States.” He further speculated about his own safety:

“And I would be a top-ten assassination target in that scenario because once you define Trump as Hitler, you also give citizens moral permission to kill him. And obviously it would be okay to kill anyone who actively supports a genocidal dictator, including anyone who wrote about his persuasion skills in positive terms.”

He goes on:

“So I’ve decided to endorse Hillary Clinton for President, for my personal safety. Trump supporters don’t have any bad feelings about patriotic Americans such as myself, so I’ll be safe from that crowd. But Clinton supporters have convinced me – and here I am being 100% serious – that my safety is at risk if I am seen as supportive of Trump. So I’m taking the safe way out and endorsing Hillary Clinton for president.”

In conclusion, Dilbert creator Scott Adams boils down all of the lunatic meat into a hardy stew of what the actual fuck:

As I have often said, I have no psychic powers and I don’t know which candidate would be the best president. But I do know which outcome is most likely to get me killed by my fellow citizens. So for safety reason, I’m on team Clinton.

My prediction remains that Trump will win in a landslide based on his superior persuasion skills. But don’t blame me for anything President Trump does in office because I endorse Clinton.

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Timothy Bertrand
Writer and journalist living in the Houston, Texas area. Follow me for breaking news, editorials, pictures of cats doing human activities, and other such content from around the web.


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