Hey there, Thursday! You’re looking mighty fine, and you’re mine. Let’s keep going and never stop until the weekend hits. And hey, if things get rough, don’t worry. We’ll always have Friday.
Now, moving on from our confusing sweet nothings, here’s some fun laughs from Twitter to get your Thursday going!
Because Googling can be pretty profound business. Trust me on this.
There’s a big difference btw knowledge and wisdom. Knowledge is something you can glean by Googling. Wisdom comes from Googling for years.
— AlexaMac Brandes (@TheWoodenslurpy) November 13, 2014
I TOLD YOU TO CLOSE YOUR EYES. You’re disloyal. Twitter shuns you forever.
Close your eyes. Now imagine a peaceful meadow. That meadow represents your betrayal. I told you to close your eyes, but you kept reading.
— Prince’s Biggest Fan (@markleggett) April 9, 2016
Specially when that f*ckboi doesn’t know when to stop with the private messages.
swipe down on tinder to send people straight to hell
— village fetish (@botandy) May 1, 2016
This is either admiration of overblown proportions — or a very elaborate method to guilt your guy. Take your pick.
Boyfriend: you really don’t have to do that
Me: *getting a lower back tattoo of his Call of Duty kill/death ratio* I’m just proud of u babe
— Elizabeth (@elizabeth_fels) February 24, 2016
No! Wait! Stop! I can’t even make money off of this skill! Help!
You know that little voice in your head that says “You’re not good at anything”? That’s you. So you ARE good. At hurtful ventriloquism.
— vladchoc (@vladchoc) April 26, 2016
Just walked by the place I had brunch last weekend and one of my friends is still sitting there talking about herself
— AmberTozer (@AmberTozer) October 22, 2015
When someone asks how you’re doing is it meant to be a rhetorical greeting or can you burst into tears?
— Svenn Amish (@amishschool) June 16, 2015
Aah, yes, the sound of cheerful MIDI music that counts down the seconds to your inevitable demise.
I’ll take “elegant metaphors for death” for $500, Alex. pic.twitter.com/S8g35oF8Uj
— Kashana (@kashanacauley) September 12, 2015
“Wow, look how gorgeous and blue Earth is from here. did I shut the gas? Lock the front door? unplug the TV? … Who cares?!”
Space exploration incorporates two of my favorite things 1.) Travel 2.) Avoiding responsibilities on earth.
— Doth (@DothTheDoth) April 18, 2016