Hey, barista friends, we love you. you make our daily fix of caffeine just the way we like it with a smile and some witty banter. A double shot of that flavor we like? No problem! Want awesome latte art on your mochaccino? Easy peasy! Want to chug down something strong enough to wake your great-great-grandmother from the dead? You got it. You’re that small slice of intellectual entertainment we get in the morning, and we appreciate that.
That’s why we just can’t fathom why customers would ever want to be mean to you. but we know you got this. You sometimes know how to express your displeasure in more creative ways beyond that simple misspelled name.
So let us laugh along with you, baristas. You deserve the spotlight.
When you’re not your competitor, you wonder why this customer is even here.
— CC (@clarisselamson) December 17, 2015
What size? What size?!?!
— Hilary (@Hi_lary23) December 16, 2015
We want to help you out, but seriously, what do you want us to make you?
“I’m allergic to hot chocolate. Not chocolate. Or milk. Or whipped cream. But when they’re all together I’m allergic.” #baristaproblems
— JoanofDarkKnits (@JoanofDarkKnits) December 15, 2015
I see what you’re trying to do, but that won’t fly here.
If you order 2 double espressos in the same cup instead of a quad espresso you deserve too get charged for 2 doubles. #BaristaProblems
— the angry barista (@barista_anger) December 15, 2015
A full wasted cookie on the floor. *heart breaks”
— Denaeuh Davis (@DenaeuhVelvet) December 15, 2015
It can be pretty tough not to roll eyes.
“Tall nonfat flat white with no foam” You want a double tall nonfat no foam ristretto latte? “No. Don’t you know your job?” #baristaproblems
— Barista Problems (@baristaproblem0) December 13, 2015
And sometimes, people just forget they have the ability to read.
— satan.☟ (@blackjuju_) December 6, 2015
We appreciate you tipping us, but sexual innuendoes don’t pay the rent. And no, just please stop.
— Sidney D (@CarolinaS1101) December 15, 2015
And then there are the insane orders.
— Hayley Funk (@funk_hayley) December 12, 2015
So. Much. Sugar. SUGAR.
— Dr. Fink (@icemyeyes) December 16, 2015
Admit it; you don’t really like coffee; you just want a sweet cold drink.
If I have to make one more god forsaken frappuccino tonight I swear to god I’ll put myself in the blender #baristaproblems
— ja rule (@tristagail) December 11, 2015
No, I don’t think you understand what a flat white really means.
— Juliana Siqueira (@juli4na) November 21, 2015
Ma’am, the laws of chemistry don’t work that way.
oh you want a hot iced caramel macchiato? oookay. ??? #baristaproblems
— danielle (@daaniiiboo) December 12, 2015
Empty threats? Oh sure, we love to be entertained!
— Clauds (@claudiascott_) December 10, 2015
If I stay real still, maybe they won’t see I’m here.
— R.B.F (@lexnicolee02) December 12, 2015
Hats off to you, baristas. May your tip jars overflow with money and awesomeness.
— Malinda (@ablessedheart) December 6, 2015